


Preconceptions

by Pluttskutt



Series: FH Flatmates AU [10]
Category: Dragon Age II
Genre: M/M, friends being friends, it's an evening together
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-17
Updated: 2017-02-17
Packaged: 2018-09-25 04:21:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,931
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9802415
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pluttskutt/pseuds/Pluttskutt
Summary: Fenris spends an evening with his friends. He enjoys their company when Garrett isn't around, and even asks Merrill for advice.





	1. Don't Steal Chips

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for your support on this series! I'm gonna say it in every part I think, but it really means a lot and makes me so happy :D

The potato chips bag rustled when Fenris tore it open. Merrill put a big bowl next to him on the counter, and he poured them in. He grabbed the other bag with the same colour.

“Thank you for helping me, I’m glad you joined us even when Garrett isn’t here,” Merrill smiled.

“Dinner was delicious, I’m sure Garrett would agree, he didn’t tell me where he went today,” Fenris pushed the bowl to the side when he emptied both bags. Garrett wasn’t okay, but he didn’t know how to help.

“He’s working with his younger siblings on the memory day for their mother, I’m glad they stopped arguing,” she smiled and took out a plastic container with chocolate squares from the fridge. They looked like tiny cakes when she put them on a plate.

“Yes,” he smiled. Garrett had been in a better mood that day. They talked like they usually did and ate together. The day after was worse again, and Fenris stayed away from Garrett. Garrett didn’t scare him, Fenris trusted he wouldn’t take out his anger on him, but he’d never comforted anyone. How could anything he said help Garrett plan a memorial for his dead mother?

Garrett wasn’t angry with him, the annoyance he showed wasn’t aimed at Fenris. It came from him being in his head too much, and when he was forced out he snapped. An exhausted sigh would escape when Fenris asked if they could go out together, but even when he snapped he never raised his voice.

His voice was tired and he tried to hide it, but Fenris knew he was exhausted. He isolated himself, which was difficult to do in the apartment so he deserved credit for that.

Fenris understood. Garrett had a lot on his mind and Fenris wasn’t his first priority. It felt weird because it happened suddenly. One day they went to the Milkshake Palace, and the next Garrett was barely around.

“Is something wrong?” Merrill asked, and he looked at him. She stretched her hands out for napkins, and he handed them over.

“Garrett is avoiding me, and I don’t know what to do,” he confessed. It felt more than Garrett just having a lot on his mind. Sure that could be an excuse, but it felt deliberate. Maybe he’d worn out his welcome?

“What are you gossiping about?” Isabela asked from the doorway, “I assume Garrett,” she raised an eyebrow and walked over to the kitchen counter. Took a potato chip.

“Garrett is avoiding Fenris,” Merrill said, and the plate on a tray.

“It doesn’t matter,” he lied. Everyone didn’t have to know. Anyone of them could share his concern to Garrett, and the fewer who knew the smaller the risk was.

“What doesn’t matter?” Anders asked, “is it the snacks? Because I disagree,” Fenris grabbed the bowl. He wanted to leave the kitchen so they’d stop talking about his problems with Garrett. It wasn’t a problem. He didn’t need a third and fourth opinion. Least of all from Anders.

“Garrett is avoiding people again,” Isabela said and grabbed another potato chips. Fenris tried to move the bowl out of her reach.

“Of course he is, why are you discussing it?” Anders questioned, and crossed his arms over his chest.

“Fenris is worried because Garrett is avoiding him,” Merrill repeated. Fenris glanced at her but said nothing. He couldn’t wait for another one of Anders’ insightful inputs on his and Garrett’s relationship.

“Fenris moved into his sanctuary and ruined it, he doesn’t have anywhere to go when he wants to be alone,” Anders said like it was obvious. Garrett had lived by himself until Fenris came along. He knew he made Garrett’s life difficult, but hearing Anders state it like they all knew it was unpleasant.

“I don’t think that’s fair,” Merrill disagreed, “we know how Garrett is when he doesn’t feel well, and it’s not Fenris’ fault,” he remained silent. Said nothing. He shouldn’t have asked. Should have kept his worries to himself.

“Are you serious? You’re gonna pretend that Garrett went to a hospital two weeks ago and haven’t met anyone after that isn’t related?” Anders raised his voice and looked at Fenris. His grip around the bowl tightened.

“You’re blaming Fenris for that?” Isabela questioned. She turned towards Anders. Fenris swallowed. They argued because of him.

“This is not worth arguing about,” he said to stop them. Behind Anders, he saw Aveline, who had left the living room. They were too loud. He should leave, and go home. Not that he was welcome there either. It was Garrett’s home, not his, and he felt he’d worn out his welcome.

“Of course you’d say that, it’s your fault,” Anders raised his hand and took a step forward, “you’re using Garrett and we all know that,” Fenris followed his finger in the air with caution.

“Calm down crusader, no one is using anyone,” Isabela said. Anders took another step forward and inhaled.

“You think it’s not obvious? How you’re all nice with us to get on his good side, you’re a stranger who lives in his home,” Fenris’ jaw tensed.

“Calm down Anders,” Aveline walked into the kitchen. Fenris’ eyes flickered between her and Anders. He forced himself to breathe.

“Don’t pretend you’re not suspicious of him, I know you did a background check on him,” Anders gritted his teeth.

“What?” Isabela questioned, and stared at them.

“I did it because I care about Garrett,” she looked at Fenris. Their eyes met. His breath caught in his throat when he realised she knew. She knew where he ran from, and she knew why. How long had she known? Did she blame him for what happened to Donnic? Why did she tell Anders?

“You can’t just run a background check on someone, what’s wrong with you?” Isabela argued. Fenris forced himself to take a deep breath. They had to stop arguing about him. He wasn’t worth their fight, he should leave. Where would he go when he wasn’t welcome anywhere?

“You know he’s wanted for murder? He murdered someone,” Anders shouted. They were wrong, he hadn’t murdered anyone.

“I didn’t murder her,” Fenris denied it. He hadn’t planned to kill her, but he knew it was his only chance to get away. Garrett said he understood. It hadn’t felt important all his friends knew, but they couldn’t think he murdered someone.

“So you didn’t kill her?” Anders sneered. Fenris swallowed. His tongue felt swollen. He did kill her, it didn’t matter he hadn’t meant to. The moment he struck her she was dead.

“It was an accident,” if she had left the room a moment longer he wouldn’t have grabbed the vase. He’d been terrified she’d stop him. The punishment would have been worse than anything Danarius had ever done.

“You’re full of shit,” Anders mocked, “you know Garrett’s mother was murdered? He’s mourning because someone like you killed her,” Fenris wondered if he would use his raised hand to strike. Garrett’s reaction hadn’t shown disgust, mistrust, or the hatred he saw in Anders. Had he faked it? Was that why he avoided Fenris, because of what he did? He should have kept quiet. Pretended nothing happened.

“I will leave,” he put the bowl on the counter. Anders stared him down. He looked to the side. Walked around him. Someone grabbed his wrist tight. He tried to pull himself free but the grip tightened.


	2. Safe

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fenris is unsure how to handle it all because he knows he did something bad but can't remember it all. He's afraid it ruin his friendship with everyone, most of all with Garrett.

A soft touch trailed up and down his arm. Thin fingers followed their own pattern and not the ones marked on his skin. He didn’t understand whose fingers they were nor where he was.

“Just close your eyes, you’ll be alright,” she said quietly and he wondered if she’d done that all the time. Her voice was melodic, calm. That a touch from someone would assure him he was safe was something he never imagined. Bethany. It had to be.

“Come morning light, you and I’ll be safe and sound,” her fingers left his arm. He opened his eyes a little to see if she’d walked away. She sat at the edge of the bed and had her phone in her hands. If she typed or played a game he could only guess.

“Oh,” she smiled when their eyes met. He looked down at the bed quickly and saw her hand next to his. It didn’t make him nervous the same way it did when Garrett’s hand was near his.

“How are you feeling? Do you want anything?” she put her phone down on the bed next to her. It wasn’t his bed, the covers he laid on were white with lavender stripes.

“Where am I?” he made no attempt to sit up. To lay on the bed felt fine if he knew which bed he laid on. Was it Isabela’s bed? His fingers twitched when they remembered they formed a fist and punched someone.

“You’re in our family house,” he glanced at her when she put her hand on his shoulder, “this is a guest room, so you can stay how long you want,” her hand was warm. The moment she touched his head he froze until he realised she wasn’t grabbing his hair but stroking it.

“The Hawke family house?” he asked. If she noticed he went stiff at her touch, she didn’t show it. The more she brushed her fingers through his hair, the more comforting it felt.

“It’s the Amell estate, but yes,” she corrected him,“do you want anything to eat or drink?” she asked.

“No,” he closed his eyes. Amell was the name of the bakery Garrett went to every morning. It’s where they met the first the first time.

“Okay,” she touched his forehead with the back of her hand, “good,” she whispered and her hand disappeared. Her fingers touched his arm and followed a new pattern. Gentle and soothing.

 

Next time Fenris opened his eyes, he was alone. A ghost shaped nightlight lit up the room from the nightstand next to him. A water glass stood beside it. He blinked repeatedly to focus his eyes on his surroundings.

White curtains with black birds covered a window, but they were easy to see through. Not that there was much to see. Outside was dark, quiet. He wasn’t in the suburbs any longer.

He propped himself up on his elbows, and a blanket fell off him. A blue coloured fleece blanket. They… Garrett had a grey one in the sofa back at the apartment. They were comfortable.

He sat up and tossed his legs over the edge of the bed. His feet touched carpet. Soft carpet. He looked around. The room was empty besides the bed he sat on.

Two doors, both grey. It had to be a house. One door led to a bathroom and another out to a hallway. Unless linked to another bedroom. He wouldn't know until he tried, so he chose the door closest to him. It was unlocked.

White. Everything was white. The floor, the walls, the sink, the toilet, and the tub. Which wasn't empty. He backed immediately and shut the door. Turned his back on it. He raised his hands to cover his face.

Garrett. Had been in the tub. Very naked. As people were in bathtubs. When they bathed. Or showered. Naked. The bubbles did their best to cover him up but he had still been very naked. Would he be angry Fenris saw him? It hadn’t been on purpose, but Garrett’s eyes had been closed so if he slept he wouldn’t have heard Fenris.

He lowered his hands to his arms and hugged himself. His arms were bare. A hole in his stomach grew bigger and told him to eat something. Not that he dared to open another door. The bed would warm him and he could control his stomach until morning.

The door opened behind him without warning. He didn’t turn around. Stayed like he was, still like a statue. When anyone wore fewer clothes around him before, it meant one thing. It hadn’t been on purpose, he hadn’t walked in on purpose, he didn’t know.

“Fenris?” Garrett said his name. Tired, and worried. Fenris swallowed and turned around. Garrett wore a fluffy red bathrobe. The relief that washed over him shamed him for even thinking Garrett would do anything to him. They were friends, nothing more.

“I apologise for not knocking,” he looked away. Garrett expected nothing of him, and did so much, and how did he repay him? By punching one of his closest friends. Anders must have rejoiced when he told that story. Finally, a valid reason to make the others dislike him.

“Apology accepted,” Garrett mumbled. Fenris glanced at him. His eyes were half closed. Slowly his arms fell to his side.

“I’m sorry for causing you more trouble,” he apologised again. Garrett raised a hand to cover a yawn.

“What trouble?” he asked and smacked his lips two times. Fenris had seen him tired a few times, but this was beyond tired. He looked like he was ready to fall asleep standing.

“I punched Anders,” Fenris said. He kept his gaze at Garrett but couldn’t look him in the eyes. They were close friends, he knew that.

“Don’t worry ‘bout it,” Garrett raised both his hands. He rubbed his eyes, which turned into rubbing his face, and then brushed both hands through his hair.

“You must be angry with me, I understand if you want me to move out immediately,” that must be why Garrett brought him to his family house. To get him out of the apartment quick, and… he wasn’t sure why Garrett would put him in the family house. If he was angry he shouldn’t want him around Carver or Bethany either.

“What happened?” Garrett asked. Fenris bit his lower lip. Anders must have told Garrett what happened, and the others too. Why was Bethany nice to him? They all had to be furious with him.

“I punched Anders,” he didn’t fully remember what happened. He knew he raised a fist and swung it, and he hit Anders, but he didn’t remember details. What happened after was gone. Anders could have pushed him hard enough to make him fall to the floor and hit his head.

“Yeah, I got that,” Garrett failed to suppress another yawn, “but what happened?” Fenris tried to go back in his memories. He punched Anders. Because Anders grabbed his wrist. He tried to walk away because of what Anders yelled at him but hadn’t been allowed.

“I should not have punched him,” he whispered. Would Anders want to get back at him if they met again? He hadn’t meant to start a feud but he wouldn’t let go. Aveline agreed with him that Fenris couldn’t be trusted. If they all decided that, he wouldn’t have been safe. So he wanted to leave but Anders stopped him.

“Why did you? I don’t need the scenario, I’ve heard he grabbed you and you socked him,” Garrett wondered. Fenris wanted him to go sleep and not worry about him but wasn’t sure he could say that. It was Garrett’s decision to be awake, not his.

“I don’t understand what you mean,” he confessed. Garrett sighed and looked at the floor. Fenris glanced at him. He didn’t look angry but that could be because he was tired. Exhausted even.

“Were you angry at him?” Garrett looked up. Fenris looked away. He’d been frustrated, but not angry. For no reason, Anders brought up what he’d done. It hadn’t been an unfair accusation because it was true but he didn’t want everyone to know. His friends wouldn’t be his friends after they knew so he wanted to keep it a secret.

Anders accused him of being a murderer. That wasn’t true. He knew he killed someone, he wouldn’t deny that, but he hadn’t planned it. Maybe that didn’t matter? He killed her.

“No,” Garrett’s mother had been murdered. By someone like him. That was what Anders said. How could Garrett be okay with what he said at the hospital? It must have been an act.

“What did you feel? What happened?” Garrett repeated his question. Fenris didn’t understand. Hadn’t he’d been told what happened? How did what he felt change what happened?

“He told everyone I killed her,” he’d done so well not thinking about it. Garrett said it was okay and he felt better after. That Garrett had been absent after hadn’t bothered him because he knew Garrett had his own life. It wasn’t until Anders decided to share his opinions at the club he thought it might have something to do with him.

“Yeah, everyone’s emotional over that, but just a tad you know, nothing to worry about really,” Fenris looked at Garrett again. He smiled. Fenris didn’t think he should.

“How can you be fine with me murdering her when your mother was murdered? What makes what I did differently?” he asked. He struggled to keep his gaze on Garrett. Every feeling Garrett had about it was important to him.

“My mother was killed by a psychopath who murdered many women and cut their limbs of to recreate his dead wife,” Garrett smiled when he said that. Not a kind smile, but a smile Fenris had seen before. The one Garrett had when he didn’t know how to act or what emotion to show. He didn’t know what to say. Nothing was good enough. It must have been horrible, but Garrett knew that. He lived it. He didn’t need obvious statements.

“So for Anders to say she was murdered by someone like you is…” Garrett groaned, “it’s false, and now they’re all upset and I just do not have the energy to care,” he hadn’t lied at the hospital. They were okay. But what about his other friends?

“They are upset with me,” he understood what Aveline did. She was police captain, and she cared for her friends. What he didn’t understand was why she told Anders, or why she hadn’t arrested him for being illegally in Kirkwall.

“And me,” Garrett scoffed, “Don't worry about it, it’ll pass one way or the other,” he sighed. Fenris tilted his head. How could it pass? They didn’t trust him. He lost his friends the moment Anders opened his big mouth about his past. A past Anders had nothing to do with. Why had Aveline told him? He didn’t understand.

“What do you mean?” he asked because Garrett was good at explaining. He didn’t think so himself, but when he was silent to think of what to say, or stumbled over words in a hurry to explain what he meant, it said a lot.

“Well one way is that we ignore what happened and it becomes the elephant in the room, and the other is that we sit down and have group therapy,” Garrett suggested with a smile, “look, you don’t have to explain anything to anyone unless you want to, but can I ask you something?” Fenris bit his lower lip. It felt like it usually did between them, but their conversation was near an end. He didn’t want that. He wanted Garrett to stay with him.

“Yes,” he nodded. Could he say that? He’d fallen asleep with Garrett in his bed before. It felt safe with Garrett close to him.

“Were you afraid?” Fenris averted his eyes, “it’s okay if you were, I just… Isabela is the only one I’ve seen you initiate physical contact with, so when Anders grabbed you…” Garrett sighed.

“I thought he’d hurt me,” Fenris whispered, “he wouldn’t let go and I knew I had to get away so I punched him but I don’t know what happened after,” he swallowed. Isabela wasn’t the only one, but Garrett hadn’t been around when he started to work on physical contact with his friends.

“You can ask Isabela tomorrow, and Carver, he brought you here,” so that was how he got to their house. Which was more of an estate, and he wondered why Garrett wouldn’t say that. He understood why Garrett’s friends thought he used him if he was rich.

“Your siblings are kind, like you,” he thought that the first time they met. They argued (mostly Bethany and Carver) but they showed more love for each other than they argued. They cared for each other and they showed it in different ways.

“Thank you,” Garrett raised a hand again. This time he reached it towards Fenris. His fingers brushed Fenris’ cheek softly like they were afraid to hurt him. Fenris leant into his touch. He closed his eyes.

Physical contact -touch- hadn’t been comforting before. It’d been an expectation, a demand, and he loathed it. The cold hands that tore his clothes, his skin, his inside, and the voices that mocked him when he begged them to stop.

Garrett didn’t think it was his right to touch Fenris. Nor the others but how Garrett acted meant more. He was warm, kind, comforting. Safe.

“Thank you,” Fenris sighed. Now he could remember Garrett comforting him without thinking of the hospital, or what lead to it. Was it wrong of him to want comfort?

“Why are you thanking me?” Garrett’s tone was quiet. Soft like the touch of his hand.

“For being here,” Fenris opened his eyes. Garrett smiled and withdrew his hand. Fenris didn’t want him to but couldn’t tell him.

“Always,” he answered, “I’m gonna sleep, want me to wake you up for breakfast?” he put his hands in his pockets. Fenris wondered if he picked out clothes on purpose with deep pockets to hide his hands in.

“I’m sleeping alone?” he asked. It made sense he’d stay the night at the house (estate) but would Garrett return with him after breakfast? Fenris understood if he wanted to stay with his siblings.

“Yeah, unless you want to sleep in my bed?” Fenris raised his arms and wrapped them around his stomach, “sorry I didn’t mean it like that, I share with Bethany and Carver when they want so… I didn’t think of how it sounded, I’m sorry,” Garrett apologised. Fenris looked down at the floor.

His reaction hadn’t been because of fear, but because he wanted to say yes. He wanted to spend time with Garrett, be close to him, and that’s why he worried.

“It’s okay,” he forced it out. What he wanted wasn’t okay. They were friends and his thoughts perverted what Garrett did for him. It was late, he was tired, and he hadn’t been with anyone since he came to Kirkwall. His thoughts would go away.

“Are you sure?” Garrett worried about him, about how he reacted. He couldn’t tell him, not ever. Eventually, he’d learn how friendship felt and find it normal.

“Yes,” he looked away. It wasn’t Garrett he liked, it was the attention Garrett gave him. The support, the kindness, and the understanding.

“Okay, I’ll go to sleep, leave you alone, goodnight,” Garrett shut the door behind him. Fenris closed his eyes. He knew he had to talk with Garrett again in the morning about what happened, why their friends were upset, and how to make amends for what he did. Isabela would listen to him if he explained why, but he was unsure about the others.

Were they upset with him because he helped Fenris? It was possible. He didn’t want to come between them and Garrett, but it wasn’t his right to question how Garrett handled his life. He’d apologise for ruining their night, but not for punching Anders. Unless Garrett asked him to.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! Don't forget to comment and/or kudos, I appreciate it a bunch :D

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Don't forget to comment and/or kudos and I'll see you in next part!


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